mein gott

yesterday was miserable.

my life began to unravel around 930 after breakfast.

i was standing with the dope italian girl underneath a huge cedar tree discussing the most esoteric of sciences when a fucking bird plopped its innards on my freaking forehead. the dope italian girl said it was a sign of a good day to come...

so, four hours later i go for a walk with the aforesaid dope one and old mother hubbard. hubbard was in search of the sweetshop so she could please the palette of many a nice young afghan male before she returned to the land of marmite and mushy peas. well, out on the streets of capult mother hubbard made the error of giving the first beggar we saw 10 afghani which meant that the rest of the trip was spent surrounded by poor miserable looking kids. which is, simply put, the pits. i soon became the object of one of these kids desire and despite my crowd-weaving skills and stealthy road-crossing i couldn't shake the little bugger. he followed us for blocks and when i finally thought we were safe the kid came out of nowhere and latched on to my right leg. he gripped on to it with his life and i couldn't pry him off. it was dreadful.

the dope one asked if it was my son and old mother hubbard gave me a lecture on poverty in developing nations as i was trying to free my damn leg from his kung-fu body grip.

finally ridding myself of the poor kid, we walked on in the crowded streets for a couple more blocks before admitting defeat and turning back. old mother hubbard leading the way, the dope one and i fell back a bit. we stopped to look at some megaphones and thought of building a mosque, when suddenly out of the crowd an afghan yelled to me in english, "hey, handsome!"

slightly unexpected.

homosexuality is rampant in poppystan, albeit with totally different social distinctions than i am used to in the lands of westbeefs. but, mein gott...